"Use All The Crayons!"
Happy Thanksgiving!
This Thanksgiving I’m grateful to all the folks who check out my stuff and share it with friends, and I’m especially grateful to those who offer tangible support. One kind soul brightened my day by out-of-the-blue sending $400 to my Stripe account.
Just for this newsletter!
I know, I know. I can’t believe it either.
If you’ve ever considered supporting me through book purchases or direct donation, now is a dandy time. But so was last year. I’m endeavoring to succeed where billionaire owners of two heirloom publications, Washington Post and LA Times are failing spectacularly (Post losing $77 million in ’24; Times, $35 million).
I put the odds at 80-20 that I could lose less — and won’t that motto look dynamite on the door to my newsroom office!
So, please support me right now. I said now, dang it!
Here’s this week’s podcast. You give me 20 minutes and I’ll give you vivid talking points on wild cows, defecating circus elephants and why it’s time to deep 6 six boring dinner table talk of death.
(Barely)-Related post … “The true tale of the Pilgrim turkey rapist”
Today’s Theme: Thanksgiving …
• It’s borderline sacrilegious but I request you include in your Thanksgiving blessing a prayer that God mention to Tom Petty that we still really miss him.
• Ask friends if the nation of Turkey has a national bird.
• Optimists understand phrase "familiarity breeds contempt" is not absolute. Often is the case that familiarity breeds family.
• Families are God's way of proving we're incapable of helping even those we love the very most.
• Daughter, 16, said she wants to have a big family. What she means is she wants to pick who's in her family.
• It is one of our greatest paradoxes, but a really big family can also serve as one of nature's most affirmative contraceptives.
• It wasn't done by design but my go-to bourbon has become the one that best describes me. I'm not a Jack or a Daniel, a Jim or a Beam. What am I? I'm a turkey who on occasion still gets a little wild. #WildTurkey
• Being a student of the promotional arts, I find myself wondering about what the character of the nation would be had, instead of puritanical church-goers celebrating Thanksgiving Day, America's founding settlers were swingers who celebrated (Sex Act) Giving Day.
Kitchen …
• There must be a baker's equivalent to "piece of cake" that is not "piece of cake." Because if a baker says something is going to be a piece of cake and shows up with a pie instead he could be accused of loafing -- and don't get me started on bakers who loaf.
• Remember, it's okay to cook on a spit, but never spit on your cook.
• The loud, jarring phenomenon that occurs when that evening’s meal preparer tries to remove the 13th pan from the bottom of a drawer designed to hold not more than 10 is "Panvalanche." Panvalanche activity also common in sinks stacked with too many dirty dishes.
HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!