"Use All The Crayons!" newsletter No. 51

Today's theme ... "Insect"

The Page 1 “Crayons!” Pledge (still applies)

The Book Is STILL Free

That’s right. Free. No charge. No gimmick. Just ask (see below). 

Today’s theme … Insect

Colorful Living Tip of the Day (I) …

• Tell friends you’d like to be a fly on the wall when flies on the wall discuss their bafflement over why any human would ever want to be a fly on the wall.


• Contend that until all  insects respect a 5-foot zone of privacy, summer’s always going to be a bit overrated.

• It’d be fun to be scorekeeper the day a dung beetle and a piss ant get into a "You think you're better than me?" contest.

• A Fab Four tribute band named "The Dung Beatles" is bound to be really shitty. 

• I don't understand the need for the redundant spelling of tsetse fly. Is there a tse fly or a tsetsetse fly from which it needs distinguishing? Really, I don't tse the point.

 • Ants eat sticks, dirt, decomposing bodies and even poop. My question: Which of their six arms do they use to comfort themselves when they get a tummy ache?

• What did cavemen call house flies?

• I wonder if fruit flies ever tire of their holier-than-thou diet and one day just say, "Screw it. Tonight I'm having cheeseburger!”

Zeitgust Word of the Week (a word I made up with the goal of getting it into a dictionary) …

Motorvator:A highly skilled mechanic capable of encouraging any poorly performing engine to  get out there and get really running so it can be the best engine it can possibly be.

Related blog post, “Kamikaze bug flies straight into my ear …”

I wondered what was going on inside the fly’s head as it flew straight inside mine. Was it a fearless scout? A fugitive? Or maybe a Jedi insect probing Death Star weak spots?It was an odd sensation because — BUZZZZ!!! — I knew it was going to penetrate my outer ear about two seconds before it did. I’ve heard it’s that way with some combat veterans who say they knew the bullet was about to strike before it did.

(Full story here)

Concluding words …

• With so many superhero movies based on the mingling of DNA, I'm surprised they've yet to sketch an insect hybrid adept at calming Opie's fears, winning the Mayberry bake-off and putting the sting on Moonshiners. All hail Ant Bee!


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Author Chris Rodell, of course, encourages you to buy it and hopes you’ll support him and the people who distribute, promote and sell books. But if you’re one of those Americans who are out of work and having a tough time, or if you know a US serviceman or woman who might benefit from a book that aims to brighten daily lives, then Rodell wants you to get in touch at storyteller@chrisrodell.com

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