"Use All The Crayons!" No. 21

Today's theme ... "Punctuation"

Today’s theme:

Punctuation

First a word from our, er, sponsors …

An enthusiastic reader asked if I accepted donations. Accept them? I wholeheartedly encourage them. The defining characteristic of my life is an inability to get people to pay for work they praise. If you’re reading this, I consider you one of my core readers. My hope is you’re enjoying this enough to encourage friends to subscribe ($5 a month/$50 a year). Tell them you’ll pay half. And if you have the disposable income, please consider supporting me with some tangible appreciation (PayPal, Venmo, 874 Solomon Temple Rd., Latrobe, Pa, 15650). Remember, this may take you just 90 seconds to read, but it’s taken me 10 years to write …

Colorful Living Tip of the Day …

Try and model your posture after positive punctuation. Be a walking exclamation point, not a question mark.


Suggested soundtrack to today’s post: “I love you, period,” by Dan Baird


Related …

• I’m a writer. My wife is an editor. When I thanked her for turning my comma into an exclamation point she corrected me.

• I’d like to see Hollywood announce it was releasing what it calls a period movie and have it be solely about punctuation.

• Those eager to see a hyphen in this sentence will suffer from dashed hopes.

• For instructional purposes, I propose we spell hyphen “hy-phen.”

• A writer, editor, or essayist who believes in the use of questionable, and, excessive, punctuation is a commanist.


Random questions …

• Please help me resolve this 4-decade old conflict: Is it mum or is Grease the word?

• The Christmas season inspires so many questions: Was the virgin birth real? Is Jesus the true son of God? Will there ever be peace on Earth? I have a question: How did Charlie Brown ever get that sweater over his huge bulbous head?

• The average person takes between 8,000- and 10,000 steps a day. That adds up to 115,000 miles in a lifetime — four  times the circumference of the globe. Question: if for one day we all together walked toward the rising sun, could we reverse time?


This week’s 2nd Random Stones ref. …

• Stones classic #ExileOnMainStreet turns 50 next year. I suggest it’s time to change iconic song title from “Shake your Hips” to "Shake Your Replaced Hips.”


Reader letter of the week …

“I can’t tell you how much I’m enjoying your “Undaunted Optimist.” I just read the chapter, “Daughter, 7, declares Bible says I must love the dog.” I laughed so hard there were tears running down my face. I haven’t laughed that hard in years!” Charlotte P., Greensburg


Zeitgust Word of the Week (a word I made up with the goal of getting it into a dictionary) …

Parroty: The conditional cliches that emerge when nearly every coach and every player from every NFL team says, win or lose, the exact same thing.


Today’s Feature Post

“A story on dots, points & periods” (from ’12)

What’s the difference between a dot, a point and a period? That may sound like the set-up to a tasteless joke regarding menstrual cycles, but it is not. I’m serious. How did this, the tiniest designation in every printed language, come to mean so much to so many? It’s invariably the smallest item on any printed page. Take a closer look: “ . ” No bigger than bug dung, it is. I could enlarge this 12-point mark to something like 64-point type, but you get the point. It’s a very small black spot. Butterfly tears have more volume.

Read extended version here


Related silliness …

A sober pondering of exclamation !!!s

The Bible needs exclamation points!!!


Oddly enough (stories from my story treasure chest) …

Story of the blind alligator wrestler

Of all the lessons culled from an unintentionally educational jaunt through the Everglades, one noteworthy nugget remains attached to my brain with barnacle-like tenacity: Never, ever party with Gator Man. Refuse his offers of rum, jungle juice and swamp swill. Don not be tempted by his tanned hospitality, his warm and chummy come-ons. Accept and the best — the very best — that can come from the encounter is you wake up with a pounding skull and a nauseous stomach. Drink with Gator Man — any gator man — and the consequences could be a loss of a finger, a hand, a limb and rivers of swamp-tainting blood.

Read full story here


Final thought …

Grammarians understand it's possible for a stationery store to be based in a mobile home.


All Chris’s books can be purchased through www.ChrisRodell.com

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