"Use All The Crayons!" ... Randoms
5-star amazon “Evan & Elle,” review …
“I bought Evan & Elle in Heaven & Hell based upon rave reviews & read it in 2 days! This entertaining read will make you think, will make you laugh out loud - ALOT. It will make you think some more, will make you teary eyed & will make you change the way you think about heaven/hell/earth/eternity - and everything “in between. I rarely read the same book twice, but this is one that I will definitely read again! Get yourself a copy! You won’t be disappointed!”
— G. Daigle
Other reviews right here
Point Park student/teacher evaluations are in. How’d I do? Eighty percent of the students rated me “excellent,” with 20 grouchy percent saying I’m merely “competent.” Majority rules! Please, until otherwise instructed refer to me as “His Excellency …”
I’ve been invited to speak to the esteemed Ligonier Valley Writers Saturday, May 20, 2 p.m., at Adams Memorial Library in Latrobe. The program is free and open to the public — just like ‘His Excellency!’
Coming up with a relevant theme is tedious and I’ve seen no evidence anyone cares about the precious detail. So more of these may become random “best ofs…” Let me know if you prefer the topical and think I’m just being lazy and — and that’s in every recipe.
RANDOMS …
• We’ve become a nation so hyper-devoted to the protocols of bodily hydration, I fully expect the CDC will one day begin to list as a leading cause of death the number of people who drown themselves while standing on dry land.
• I’ll bet there are many days each week Dick Cheney wakes up and is stunned to realize he is no longer President of the United States.
• I was stuck at an interminable red light wondering about all the things that take so damn long. Things like waiting for the computer to boot up, TSA lines, and getting stuck on IT hold. Our busy lives are consumed by mini-eternities. Want to know something that goes by like lightning? Sixty years.
• I can only conclude anyone who says puns are the lowest form of humor has never seen an Adam Sandler flick.
• People say I repeat myself when I'm drunk. People say I repeat myself when I'm drunk.
• I was stuck at an interminable red light wondering about all the things that take so damn long. Things like waiting for the computer to boot up, TSA lines, and getting stuck on IT hold. Our busy lives are consumed by mini-eternities. Want to know something that goes by like lightning? Sixty years.
• Exorcising your demons can lead to spiritual peace. Exercising your demons just leads to really fit demons.
• I was stuck at an interminable red light wondering about all the things that take so damn long. Things like waiting for the computer to boot up, TSA lines, and getting stuck on IT hold. Our busy lives are consumed by mini-eternities. Want to know something that goes by like lightning? Sixty years.
• Hearing people judge those who attend hurricane parties always cracks me up. This is Planet Earth 2023. Climate change, drought, injustice, partisan rancor -- and most of us remain by choice oblivious to it all. It's one big Hurricane Party and we're all standing in line while the bartender cuts citrus fruit garnish. Party on.
• The Metric System has been the dominant unit of measurement in England since about 1680. The Who are an English rock band formed in 1964. Pete Townsend wrote the hit single "I Can See for Miles" in 1966, one year before setting foot in the USA. Question: In the 1st draft of the song, did Townsend try the lyric, "I Can See For Kilometers and Kilometers and Kilometers …"
• I’ve come to believe Mr. and Mrs. Dumpty were two of the world's worst parents. Leaving an egg baby in such a precarious position is bad enough, but whose idea was it to name the Dumpty kid, Humpty? Did they even have the conversation, "Hon, we can't name him Humpty or he's doomed to become a nursery rhyme. Let's go with Phil or Burt." In their defense the Dumptys were just a couple of egg heads. And egg backs. Egg butts. Etc.
I welcome your donations. Please consider supporting me with some tangible appreciation (PayPal, Venmo, 874 Solomon Temple Rd., Latrobe, Pa, 15650).
All Chris’s books can be purchased through www.ChrisRodell.com